One More Day

Life is full of ups and downs. Changes come and go regularly. We were sent here to grow from these changes. The Lord knew what we would experience, and allows us to because He knows what is to gain from it. Henry B. Eyring said, "It is clear that we will need more than human strength. The Psalmist was right: “But the salvation of the righteous is of the Lord: he is their strength in the time of trouble.” The restored gospel of Jesus Christ gives us help in knowing how to qualify for the strength of the Lord as we deal with adversity." One thing I've been thinking of lately is the lesson of not taking people for granted. You never know when someone won't be in your life again.
Diamond Rio came up with the perfect song to express my somewhat deep thoughts today.
Last night I had a crazy dream
A wish was granted just for me
It could be for anything
I didnt ask for money
Or a mansion in Malibu
I simply wished, for one more day with you

One more day
One more time
One more sunset, maybe I'd be satisfied
But then again
I know what it would do
Leave me wishing still, for one more day with you

First thing I'd do, is pray for time to crawl
I'd unplug the telephone
And keep the tv off
I'd hold you every second
Say a million I love you's
Thats what I'd do, with one more day with you


One more day
One more time
One more sunset, maybe I'd be satisfied
But then again
I know what it would do


Leave me wishing still, for one more day
Leave me wishing still, for one more day
Leave me wishing still, for one more day with you

I know that I speak for myself and many of you when I say I am surrounded by so many people that love me. It's so easy to get caught up in the things of the world, but I know that the most important gift we can give ourselves and those around us is love. Be grateful for those who love you and those you have the pleasure to love. We have no guarantees with those around us, our only solid guarantee is that Heavenly Father knows and loves us, and our Savior Jesus Christ is our personal Redeemer and Friend. They will compensate every tear shed and every heart broken while we live and learn on Earth. How blessed we truly are!!

Lately

I forget about this thing (blog) on a regular basis. Life has been absolutely crazy lately. This is by far the most stressful semester I have had. It doesn't really feel like it, but I think it may be. So, I just got hired at Gold's Gym as a personal trainer! This is really exciting. I love the gym. It has really helped with some personal/physical/mental recovering that I needed. It will be fun to work there, crazy to add to my schedule, but fun. I went to the orthopedic surgeon to have my medial meniscus looked at, and I have a meniscial tear. This will prevent me from competing in a figure skating competition this year...so that's a bummer. But, Dr. Kimball, the doctor of the BYU football team told me that he has not seen a female with such a developed quadricep complex with such little damage, which means (he says) I have perfect form in exercise. He says I am in better shape, health wise, than 90 % of his patients. He was really proud of me. This was seriously like a tender mercy of the Lord. I have really struggled with a couple things regarding my body, and I have always been upset by diagnoses from the doctor. Meanwhile, every blessing I get talks about how healthy of a life I will live. I finally understand!! Yay!! I am just so grateful for this. I know I will live a great life!
Let's see...what else...my mom is getting remarried...awkward. I guess I always thought she wouldn't get remarried until I was married. I haven't exactly been honest with her with my feelings about this. But, somehow she found out. And she texted me and said I love you and am putting your name on the temple prayer roll. Holy cow..my mother is perfect. She is so intuitive. She is the second greatest blessing the Lord has given me. I feel like I can go through anything in this life because I have such a great, supportive mother.
The weather has made me so happy lately! It's gorgeous. Although, it has severe ADD and will snow tomorrow I'm sure. I can't wait to start hiking and swimming and tennis. I love outside things!!
Hmm..I feel like I should put something insightful I have learned lately. Well, it's not really insightful, and I'm sure everyone has already learned this, but seriously...can I just say that Heavenly Father is fully and completely aware of us and where we are at in life? He totally is! And I'm so grateful. He gives me exactly what I need for growth and happiness.
Oh, and boys are still gay...they make my life a living hell on a regular basis...I should figure out how to fix this.

Oh, Hollywood, you've done it again.

Really, Heidi Montag, really? Heidi Montag just underwent twelve hours of plastic surgery to have ten different adjustments made to her body. On GMA, she said that she didn't think she was pretty enough, that triple D's weren't big enough, and that she had to look in the mirror everyday and to be happy she needed to change her looks. Oh my sadness. She wants to look like Barbie and thinks that becoming a new and improved person is just fine and a choice that only affects her. Oh really? Girls and women will continue to pick their bodies apart, because women like Heidi think they can become a manufactured body? It is heart breaking to me that as a dear friend of mine just recognized her year mark of being paralyzed in an accident and celebrates her lessons learned as she will never walk again, that Heidi would complain about one dang wrinkle. She disgusts me. I feel bad for her that she has the feelings that she has, but the fact that she is willing to promote plastic surgery in that way is ridiculous. Heavenly Father doesn't mess up. He knew what He was doing when He created us. Confidence will never come to Heidi because she doesn't know where to find it. Confidence comes from as virtue, modesty, and chastity, because these things take the attention off of the external, superficial, physical parts of us. When we look inside ourselves and figure out who we are from the inside and then have that reflect and shine forth....THEN we can have confidence. We as women need to stand up and proclaim this. One of my new goals and a goal I have never had before in my life is modesty. I finally figured out why it's important. We will never be happy or have confidence if we focus on the external, superficial things. Dressing immodestly places attention on my body in a way that will not bring happiness. As I watch the Olympics aka the best two weeks of my life, I LOVE to see all the incredible things done with a human body. These people take years and years and even decades developing skill that I can only imagine. They practice and practice and work and work. And they grow to be confident and they compete against the best of the best. This is what I want my kids to think is done with a human body, not looking like Barbie. These people deserve the spotlight, not Heidi Montag.

Life is a gym...didn't you know?

So I have had a lot on my mind lately. Whether it's watching the news or talking with friends or thinking about my own life, it seems as if there are always people that are having a hard time. So many people do really stupid things that affect other people. It is so hard to care about someone and see them do something that is wrong and won't bring them happiness. I was talking to my mom about it and told her that in my world, the worst thing that would ever happen to someone is they lose a football game, which can be pretty tragic, especially if it's to LSU. :) Well, later, I was talking to God about this. And I told Him that I just don't know how he can stand to watch His kids do such stupid things to hurt each other and themselves. Then there is things like Haiti, Katrina, and other natural disasters that are hard for people. I told Him that I just don't even know if I want to deal with all that pain of watching my kids get so hurt someday. So I told Him that I was just going to have them deal with football losses. Well, He said, "stephanie, do you really want your children to grow up with no life muscles?" See, I love the muscular system. My major is the greatest, all we do is study the body and fitness. Everyone knows that muscles are developed by a wearing and tearing of a muscle. This week I was doing my upper body workout. I was supposed to balance on an exercise ball and then bench 50 pounds. It was so so hard the first time I did it, I seriously could feel my arms just getting numb as the weights kept coming towards my face. My trainer spotted me the last few times and helped me push up what I couldn't but he would not let me just wimp out and not complete my total reps. Well the second time I worked my upper body I was able to do it with more ease, and not as much help from my trainer. The point is, I got more strength because my trainer made me do something I didn't think I could and wouldn't take the weights off, just helped ease the amount it affected my arms. Well, we need life muscles even more than we need muscles for our body. And in life, our trainer (Christ) isn't always going to take the weights off us, but just help spot us so that it doesn't crush us. And as we continue to exert faith and strength, we will see that it is easier the next time it's time to deal with heavy weights again. Well, as God via the Spirit is telling me this, I realized that if the worst thing that happened to us was a loss to LSU or the UofU then we would just be lifting five pounders when we could lift a lot more. We would be very weak, when we could be very strong. I am paying good money to get strong with my trainer just like Christ paid a huge price to get us to be strong. We can do it, y'all!! I know somedays just seem unbearable because of the heartache of this life. But heaven isn't too far. He comes and gives us bits and pieces as often as we seek, especially in the gym.

Christmas Report and Winter Updates Mixed in with a little advice to all you busy folks!

Okay I am like religiously opposed to overloading my blog, but I went like three weeks without writing...so I'm going to write two within the same day!! So, Christmas was great! I spent it with my family in California. Michael took me to Wicked aka the most awesome three hours of my life! I loved it. I'm sure I'll have a blog about it sometime. I love my family. I missed my dad. I wish he was still a part of my family...I mean I know he is, but I don't know it's obviously not the same. Anyways, I am so blessed with my extended family. My mom's dad and her two brothers are phenomenal and really step up to be a father figure in each of our lives. I love them more than they will ever know I think! Michael and Ryan are the best brothers I could ask for. I mean, sometimes, I wish they were more active in the Gospel. I just know how much happiness it brings me, but I love them nonetheless. They are fantastic to me. Ryan said, "you know steph when people ask me about my family, I say 'my mom is the nicest person i know, michael is the smartest person i know and well my sister, she's my favorite person i know". And let's be honest my mom is a priceless jewel in my life. Gosh, I think God told me I was going to have the most angelic mother there was but I would have to endure other trials to have her and I was like, sign me up. She's honestly worth it! I have so much respect for her. So yeah Christmas was GREAT!!! Love the holiday. Love every kind of celebration of Christ we can have!
Okay, so now for Winter updates....HOLY BUSYYYYY!!! The break was like a weird one, I knew it would be the last break I have for a long time. I will be in 18 credits Winter, 9 credits Spring, 9 credits Summer, 20 credits Fall, plus Independent Study to finish up so I can graduate. I work twenty hours a week. I will be certifying soon to be a trainer and add about sevenish hours a week training people. I already spend a good hour or two at the gym everyday. Ice skating practice at 6 am (which is why I need to be sleeping right now). I'm meeting with a new advisor to try and crack out this obesity/eating disorder prevention campaign soon. Prepping for graduate school. Ahhhh!!!! So, I hate saying the things that I'm busy with, but don't worry there is a purpose. One of my favorite scriptures is in Matthew 14:23. Jesus had been running around healing people, teaching people, you know saving the world. Well, it says, "And when he sent the multitudes away, he went up into a mountain apart to pray and when the evening was come, he was there alone". Oh my gosh everyone stop what you are doing right now and pick this scripture apart to how it applies to your life. I just think that if the Man who could endure all pain and suffering possible felt in needful to go away into the mountains by Himself, shouldn't we also take time for meditation and reflection alone? I know for me, I get so caught up with people and just doing things to just do them, I need to sit down look at myself (internally) and make sure I'm on the right track...That the things I do have purpose and meaning. A wise friend once said to me, "steph, I learned the most when I found out how to be okay with myself by myself". With no one else's approval or validation, are we really ok? I say this typing a blog that I expect people to read and validate haha. But seriously, think about it. Are you okay with yourself and your life without other's validation or direction? I have a long ways to go, but it's something I have been working on for TWO years!! Holy crap, it's been that long since my road to self discovery. Well here was a significant milestone I achieved tonight. BYUSA campaigning is coming up, oh joy, and I was asked to be a part of a core team. I have always done this, and it's weird to actually say no, but I did! I thought about it by myself without any input from outside sources besides God and me and then God and I made the decision to decline. Although this seems very minuscule, I know the Lord cares. I know that who I am does not consist of what I do. So even though that list makes me feel busy, it shouldn't make me feel any more important and of worth than if I did one thing on the list. I am so so so so so grateful for this belief I finalllllly developed. It has made a serious and lasting impact in my life. So as the new year starts and you make goals, just remember that it's about who we become not what we do. We have a long, long time to develop, we don't need to meet every expectation this year!!
On that subject, I just want to share my last soap box. Coolest discovery thus far in my college career: I'm going to live a long life!!! So with different things I do to take care of myself I will live an average 17 years longer than the average person in America!! AWESOME. These things include: religion, duh; exercise, nutrition, no smoking, no alcohol, aka WORD OF WISDOM. It's true people!!! Isn't that great! Oh and in the Word of Wisdom it says that the promise is to run and not be weary, walk and not faint...if that's a promise, we should probably start doing those things now, its not just gonna hit us when we die. We need to develop healthy habits while we can!! Eat well and exercise!! Take care of that beautiful God given body!!
Thanks to all my family and friends that make life better every day and I'm excited for the next 70 years we have together and then on to....FOREVER!!! <3

Brotherly Conversations...

I am really bad at this whole blogging thing. I have tried to write a new post three times and then for some reason it won't publish or I get distracted or whatever..it just doesn't get published. But I HAVE to share this once and for all!!! (Christmas/Winter updates will be published another time!) Okay, so I was on a drive with Michael and he said, "You know steph, I know you've been mocked for often you talk to mom on the phone, but in all seriousness, I think it's great. Whatever she is saying to you must be working. I see her more and more in you. I watched you this Christmas, your mannerisms, the way you talk to people, the advice you give, it is so much like her...and well, that's a good thing". OH MY GOSH, the tears just poured out. That was one of the nicest things I have ever been told. I LOVE my mom. For those of you that know her, there is plenty of reason to love her. I have tried to be like her for years!!! Well, then I got to thinking, and I realized how I would like for another Elder Brother to say something similar to me someday....
"Steph, I know you've been mocked for how often you talk to Father, but in all seriousness, I think it's great. Whatever He is telling you must be working. I see Him more and more in you. I watched you this year, your mannerisms, the way you talk to people, the advice you give, it is so much like the way He would. and well that's a good thing"
Well then reality hit me...I do not spend nearly enough time on my knees as I do on the phone. But I know that if I did, I would hear the Savior say something similar to me someday. I know that prayer is so important. It really is incredible that there is an Eternal Being that isn't simply my God, but my Father, and he does love me and care to listen to me everyday!
I don't know if this analogy will mean as much to any of you as it did to me, but it really helped me put in perspective how important prayer is!!

Girls-Love yourself, dangit!

Well, its way too late, my mom didn't answer her phone, and so I need to find some way to get out my frustration...so here goes a vent...sorry! So as said in previous blog, I LOVE being a girl. We have it set in this world in so many ways. Growing up, I remember one day my dad got home from work and as he walked in the door and I was throwing a hair brush strait at my brother. My dad looked at him and said, "What did you do to your sister?" Awesome, right! :) There are so many great things about being a girl! One thing, though, that really bothers me is our dependence on what others think, especially boys. Why do we let one guy's opinion ruin our day? There have been so many times where if I don't get the attention I want from some random guy, I let it put me in a bad mood. I'm sure that in a year, he will not be in my life anymore and what he says should be out of my life in a minute. If you like your hair a certain way, wear it that way. If you like a shirt, wear it. If you don't, don't wear it. Best advice EVER: Go to your room. Sit down on your bed. And evaluate yourself. Learn to be okay with yourself BY YOURSELF. Or as Lucy off of 7th heaven says, "if you aren't happy as an individual of one how can you be happy in a relationship of two." Girls, love yourself! Because as Loreal says, 'you're worth it".
Boys do stupid things...after one does just read these lyrics by jessica simpson
I belong to me

It's not that I don't wanna share my life with you, baby
It's just that I'm the one I need to be true to, baby
And I won't give up me to be part of you

It's not that I don't want to have you in my life, baby
It's just you gotta know that it's got to be right, baby
Before I open up my heart to you

I don't need somebody to complete me
I complete myself
Nobody's got to belong to somebody else

I belong to me
I don't belong to you
My heart is my possession
I'll be my own reflection

I belong to me
I'm one, not half of two
And if you're gonna love me
You should know this, baby
That I belong to me

I gotta let you know before I let you in, baby
That who I am is not about who I am with, baby
That don't mean I don't wanna be here with you, I do

Love don't mean changin' who you are
To be who somebody wants you to be
Nobody's got to belong to nobody

Don't get me wrong, I love boys, and can't wait to marry one and be with him until the day after forever, but many boys will come along and could possibly break my heart until I find the one that will complete me...until then, this song is the bomb.com!
Really, just love yourself! That's all!